EVERYTHING WRONG WITH "Hearts Are on Gifts":
Slurpy / Hey guys! May I please have some popcorn to share with my friends?
Party Hat / No trouble!
[But there is trouble; how is a popcorn stand made of yarn stable enough?]
(Controlly presses a button which thaws all the cylinders. The contestants in them instantly start saying things, such as "My oh my what just happened?")
[Controlly thaws all the cylinders with just one button press!]
Controlly / Well, guys, I understand how you feel. But it's more important that you're safe than that your friend's safe. Anyways, you two will be traversing a set of monkey bars.
[Hey, that's not fair... Baguette can reach higher because he's thinner!]
Controlly / Baguette has won the tiebreaker, so he gets the last box...
(box passed to Baguette)
Controlly / While Boat is eliminated.
(XL cylinder falls on Boat)
Boat / Awww...
(cylinder freezes)
[Baguette and Boat are at the monkey bars...]
Controlly / Alright, Hot Dog, Popsicley, Chocolatey and Baguette, you can all open your boxes now!
[Now suddenly both of them are at the elimination buttons!]
Pizza (to the camera of the video) / Everyone, all you viewers out there, thanks for voting me back in! I owe each of the 92 of you a slice of pizza, but I don't have enough for all of you, so you'll just have to split it however. (throws slices at the camera and they disappear)
[He was recently unfrozen; how did he get a pizza box?]
Shieldy / Ooh! I wonder what that would be?
Chocolatey / Is it gonna be tree decorating?
[Chocolatey, why are you looking at your ornament? It won't talk to you!]
Hot Dog / Maybe carol singing?
Pizza / It better not be carol singing...
[Pizza, don't be scared of little assumptions!]
Hot Dog / Oh my mustard- what just happened to Baguette?
Chocolatey / What?? Whoah, now I don't see him anywhere.
[What do you mean "what??" You already saw him vanish!]
Chocolatey / Now look what just happened to Popsicley?!
Hot Dog / What?!
[Same thing!]
Controlly (shows up on a screen) / Hey, Team Chocolate! Like the package vehicles I put you in?
[How did Controlly do this? There are no cameras around him!]
Slurpy (picking out stories involving candy eating) / Here's some that Chocolatey will like...
[Let's hope Chocolatey won't rip out the candy and try to eat it.]
Party Hat / Are you seriously wrapping that many jars of candy, Shieldy? That's more than enough for the entire team!
Shieldy / Come on, they'll want to be provided for a long time!
Party Hat / Alright then... (collecting a Santa chocolate lollipop)*
[How are you guys carrying such heavy bags?]
Party Hat / Hey guys! How was your music collecting?
Shelly / It was okay. But it was heavy.
Pizza / Looks like you two already got candy for Chocolatey!
[Can't you get some more, just to be friendly?]
Pizza / Hey guys, I found a lot more! (puts a large collection into his bag) This is a really large Christmas shopping if you'll ask me!
[Well, don't overdo yourself!]
Party Hat / Wow! I'm exhausted.
Shieldy / I think all of us are...
Pizza / Well, I can see Controlly's chart, and it tells me that we're in the lead by 125 grams.
Slurpy / Plus time's almost up! Does that mean we're bound to win now?
Shelly / Yeah, I think so!
[Don't give up! You can get some more!]
Hot Dog / Aww, this is terrible!
[Hot Dog, slow down! You're gonna crash in the wall!]
Hot Dog (reading) / Make-up and polish... Floating devices... Cooking kits. Ah hah! Pizza will love those! (rides to the cooking kits section) (looking at a kit for making pizza) There's a perfect one! (uses a lot of strength to get that kit and put it in his vehicle)
[Hot Dog uses tons of strength to get a package in his vehicle...]
Chocolatey (going down the aisle quickly) / Please show me something for Slurpy, please, please, please! (halts by a kit of straws for constructing) YES! I FOUND SOMETHING! (flings it into her vehicle)
[but Chocolatey is strong enough to just throw it in there without breaking anything!]
(Hot Dog, Popsicley, Chocolatey and Baguette put their hands in the center one by one, then fling them in the air in happiness)
[Are they football players?]
Controlly (showing a screen of Party Hat, Shieldy, Shelly, Slurpy, Pizza) / So viewers, vote for a member of Team Vanilla to be eliminated.
[See, Team Vanilla? That's what you get for just stopping!]
Controlly / Voting ends on December 8, and Episode 10 will come out on January 1, 2014 - BOTO's first anniversary!
[Should not say HAPPY ANNIVERSARY until the time really comes. It's a month early.]
Hot Dog (reading the hamburger-cheeseburger story) / Wow... this book is amazing! Thanks a lot, Pizza!
Pizza / You're welcome!
Hot Dog / Oh, and I got something even better for you! (moving the wrapped package with a pizza kit)
Pizza / Seriously? Why thank you! I wonder what it is! (starts unwrapping it)
[Hot Dog and Pizza, you should wait for the rest of the contestants and have a big present-unwrapping occasion!]
COUNT: 21 *AW C'MON!*